I’ve been married for 20 years.
My older child is in high school. My younger one is still in elementary school.
And honestly… I am exhausted from this marriage.
Six years ago, I discovered his affair.
What I felt at that moment wasn’t just pain — it was complete emotional death.
I truly wanted a divorce.
He begged me to stay.
He apologized, promised to change, even wrote a written guarantee.
During the time we talked about divorce, he suddenly became attentive —
to me, to the kids, to both families.
He responded to everything. He seemed “present.”
Please don’t laugh at me.
Before the affair, I was already living like a widow —
no love, no emotional support, carrying everything on my own.
Ironically, it was his betrayal that made him *start acting like a husband*.
And somehow, I stayed.
For years after that, my life became a loop:
healing myself, then forcing myself to let go —
over and over again.
But deep down, I always knew the truth:
he never really changed.
He still loves being out.
The quiet, sneaky type — calculating, cautious, always afraid of being caught.
At home, though, he’s unbelievably lazy.
He never takes initiative. Never truly shares responsibility.
Today was the breaking point.
My child had an outside class and finished at 8 p.m.
I had to work late, so I asked him to pick our child up.
Instead, he went out drinking.
He completely ignored the situation —
didn’t pick up the child, didn’t arrange anything else.
I got home at 9 p.m. and called him.
He sounded drunk.
I could barely hear him — probably another “female friend” nearby.
Then he hung up on me.
That was the moment I collapsed inside.
I work.
I earn money.
I take care of the kids.
I hold this family together.
And he has never once *actively* shared the load.
I am so tired.
Emotionally tired.
Life-tired.
Men like this…
are they really that rare in this world?
1 Comment
Thank you for being willing to share such a real and heavy experience.
The fact that you’ve made it this far already shows how much you’ve been carrying.
From your words, we don’t see a simple marital issue.
What we see is emotional exhaustion caused by long-term neglect, emotional depletion,
and having to shoulder family responsibilities alone.
This kind of exhaustion isn’t something that can be fixed by simply “thinking more positively.”